Negotiation used to scare me for a long time. Especially since, as we know very well, we negotiate for a better salary. However, when you lack self-confidence, it's quite complex... So how do you successfully negotiate? There are techniques to know, because as psychologist Daniel Goleman says, a person who knows how to negotiate well is someone who masters the psychological dimensions. So, here are the 7 techniques to become a formidable negotiator!
First rule: trust must be there, it's the foundation.
Charles Richter, a psychologist, explains that trust is like a lubricant that facilitates better cooperation. It's not just a matter of feeling, you know 🤔. We must be open, practice active listening and be kind. To do this, we need to be approachable, smile, and show interest in others and the company in general.
👉 How can this play out in a salary negotiation? It's simple, we show our superiors that we are invested and interested in people throughout the year. If we show up on the day of our annual review without having maintained good relationships, we're off to a bad start 😅.
👋 You might find this article interesting: How to sell yourself in an interview
One thing that often betrays me when I'm stressed is my body language. Yes, our body speaks as much as our mouth! 55% of our communication is through the body, as proven by psychologist Albert Mehrabian.
I know I need to be careful with my hands, I often fidget with them when I'm overwhelmed by my impostor syndrome.
There are a lot of gestures to be mindful of, like maintaining eye contact or not crossing your arms. Of course, we shouldn't put on an act, the goal is to stay natural, but we need to be careful not to let our stress take over and know how to manage our emotions 🤯.
Before wanting to negotiate, we must understand what the other person wants. So, we step a bit outside the frame of salary negotiation, but there are many professional situations where we need to negotiate something, like when we want to sell a contract to a client.
We must encourage the other person to explain their reasoning, and if we're unsure about what they want, we shouldn't hesitate to rephrase. A good negotiator is a pro at questioning to identify deep thoughts and motivations.
➕Bonus point: by asking questions to our interlocutor, we show genuine interest, which works in our favor 😜!
Here, we need to set aside our fear of silence (it's not true, I don't feel concerned at all😬). Even if it can make us uncomfortable when we're not used to it, it's actually a real secret weapon.
Indeed, once we've stated what we want to achieve, staying silent creates a slight tension that forces the other person to speak and make more concessions. Many people fall into this "trap" because we're often used to filling silence. It's seen as something negative, but when used wisely, it can move the situation in our favor 🤫.
⚖️ However, we need to balance it! We shouldn't let silence linger until it becomes deeply uncomfortable. It's all about balance!
We're all the same: when we receive something, we feel like giving back. It's ingrained in us, almost instinctive.
👉 We should therefore make a concession first, so the other person feels indebted and will be more inclined to reciprocate.
How do we do it? We start by asking for a lot so we can then make concessions. This will add value to what we give up. I think everyone has done this before, even at a flea market 📦. Well, we just need to apply the same principle in the professional world! However, we avoid giving too much at once, or it becomes too suspicious 👀.
No matter what type of negotiation we're doing, if we don't have arguments, we'll miss the mark completely. We need solid arguments to prove that our request is legitimate and reasonable.
No need to spell it out, when renegotiating salary, we talk about the goals we've achieved, the investment we've made, the numbers we've hit, etc.. In short, we need to prove that we deserve to earn more money for all the work we've done 💪!
The more solid arguments we provide, the harder it will be to say no to us… Oh yes 😆!
Before going to negotiate, we should always have in mind our "BATNA" (Best Alternative To a Negotiated Agreement), which is our best backup plan if things fall through. This helps avoid accepting a deal that doesn't suit us under pressure.
For example, if our company senses that we're considering leaving to find something better elsewhere, it will be more inclined to make efforts.
Our BATNA is the greatest source of power in a negotiation, it's what gives us the confidence to say no to something that doesn't suit us. However, it's crucial to carefully think through our backup plan. No quitting on a whim, of course 😅…
Editorial Opinion: A Good Dose of Self-Confidence?Each point requires a good dose of self-confidence and a deep understanding of human dynamics, and this process can sometimes weigh heavily on our mental health. Negotiating, especially in high-stakes contexts, can generate stress and anxiety, and these aspects should not be neglected. If you feel constant pressure or struggle to manage the stress that accompanies these moments, it might be beneficial to consult a psychologist. A professional can provide the necessary tools to effectively manage stressful situations. 🤗 Understand yourself, accept yourself, be happy... It's here and now! |
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Article presented by Lauren Hart
Writing is a beautiful means of expression that I cannot do without. It has allowed me to channel my hypersensitivity, plus I love writing about psychology and personal development. For me, self-understanding is the best way to move forward!
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