8 Tips For Living With An Inflexible Person

Last updated by Katie M.

Excessive rigor, control, the need to be right all the time… it’s suffocating and exhausting to live with an inflexible person! They’re great believers in “you must”, “I have to”, “do this”, etc. Basically, the inflexible individual wants to control everything. However, you shouldn’t forget that this behavior is linked to suffering and great anxiety. So, how can you negotiate with an inflexible person to live more serenely? Here are 8 tips to bear in mind so that it goes more smoothly.

8 Tips For Living With An Inflexible Person

8 tips for negotiating with an inflexible person

1. Communicate

This is the key to any relationship (family, romantic, professional), as is active listening. You need to be able to positively welcome differences in ideas, opinions and ways of doing things. Of course, the inflexible individual remains closed-minded and strict, but you need to pay attention to what the other one thinks and feels. This also enables you to express your emotions and ideas calmly, without entering into conflict.

➜ It’s easier to deny a reproach than an emotion experienced by others, which is why it’s necessary to communicate them to the inflexible person.

>>> To learn more about how to let go and live freely

2. Don’t be confrontational

It’s useless and ineffective to confront an inflexible individual. If they need so many frameworks and rules, it’s because they’re anxious people. They’re therefore not in control of their rigidity, which is why it’s better to bring things in gently. Non-violent communication helps a lot in this sense.

đź’ˇ Step by step, it’s possible to relax the inflexible person and to soften the dictated rules. Patience and empathy are needed to show understanding for the other person.

3. Determine your priorities

In order to live more serenely and also reassure the inflexible person, it’s important to determine with them what is a priority. Indeed, establishing what is necessary for them will help you to calm them down, but also highlight their anxieties. On our side, we’ll know what is particularly sensitive for the other person, and we’ll pay attention to it. It’s a behavior that will be noted, which will relax the inflexible person for other points.

4. Use “we”

The killer “you” is the best way to increase tension! Indeed, it puts the other person in opposition to our way of doing things and our desires. To include the other person in a process, a reflection, an action, you need to use “we”. For example:

  • ❌ “You always do it like that!”
  • âś… “What if we did it like this?”

The 'we' erases the feeling of being in opposition, so it also helps to avoid confrontation with the inflexible individual.

5. Show love and humor

You live with or love an inflexible person, and they’re also loving, too. This is the precious key to softening their rigidity. Showing humor and love is essential for building a healthy and solid relationship. It also facilitates communication because there is an established trust.

⚠️ Be careful, however, not to hurt the feelings of the inflexible individual. Under the guise of humor, you can’t get everything across, and it’s vital you take care not to hurt others.

6. Suggest activities

Inflexibility is accentuated by daily life. So to get a change of air, it may be interesting to suggest activities that relax the other person. You shouldn’t forget that rigidity is a defense mechanism for obsessive personalities. So you should recommend ideas of things to do while asking for the other person’s opinion.

⌚ With an inflexible individual, it’s best not to leave things to the last minute. Spontaneity is something that’s difficult for them to master, but it’s perfectly fine to plan activities in advance.

7. Define your personal space

Living with an inflexible person isn’t easy, whether it’s with your partner, your parents, a friend, etc. So in order to live together as best as possible, you need to define your personal space. Explain to the other person that they shouldn’t come into this space. It allows you to have a zone where you feel freer, without the other person controlling you. It may be a bedroom, a room or even an area like your office. By doing this, you avoid conflicts and turning your anger into violence.

8. Protect yourself

Unfortunately, sometimes, no matter how much effort you make, it doesn’t work. The other person is unable to break free of their rigidity or become more flexible. If this behavior becomes toxic for you, you need to take a step back to protect yourself psychologically. Indeed, a person who cannot control their anxieties and is unable to manage their emotions can become unhealthy for you. In this case, you need to distance yourself by explaining your reasons.

➜ You can’t save everyone, even if you love the person. They need to be the one to make the decision to seek help.

Editor’s note: Avoid confrontation

“That’s the way it is”, “you need to…”, “you have to…”, “don’t do that…” Living or working with an inflexible person isn’t always easy. Just remember that getting into a confrontation won’t help, quite the contrary. Answer calmly, follow these 8 tips, and you’ll come to an agreement. And by the way, you don’t live with an inflexible person by chance? What attracted you to them? An unconscious need to be led? If your relationship is a problem for you, don’t hesitate to contact one of our psychologists to take stock of the situation.

🤗 Understanding yourself, accepting yourself, being happy... It’s here and now!

#BornToBeMe

Be sure to check out these articles too;

Article presented by
Katie, M.

"🌻 Discover the world through my eyes."

Read our latest articles here:

5 Tips to Step Out of Your Comfort Zone: Embrace the Unknown!

I’m starting to get tired of the routine and daily grind. Yet, I’m hesitant to step out of my comfort zone and take the leap. My bubble is reassuring, and so far, I’ve thrived in it, but I no longer want to be held back by the fear of trying new things. Stepping out of your comfort zone brings many benefits, so how can you dare to take the plunge? Here are 5 tips to get started! 💪

New Year’s Resolutions: Choose Them Wisely or Give Yourself a Break!

We tend to think of New Year as a sort of fresh start, making it the perfect time to break a bad habit and adopt a better one. After all, we all want to be better, so it’s natural to want to make good resolutions to bring about change. But what happens when we don’t stick to them? After years and years of watching t-shirts pile up because “this year, I’m starting to exercise” and never following through, hello, sense of failure! So, what do we do with New Year’s resolutions? Do we choose better ones or just forget about them altogether? 🥳

What is Neuroatypicality? Why Is It Being Talked About?

If there’s one article I was eager to write for Wengood, it’s this one. I’m part of what’s called the “neuro-A” community, in other words, “neuroatypical” individuals. It might be a term you’ve heard before without really knowing what it means. So, what is neuroatypicality or neurodivergence? Is it an illness? A personality trait? A way of functioning? If you’re asking yourself these questions, you’re in the right place—I’m here to answer them.

Intermittent Explosive Disorder: When Anger Becomes Destructive

Intense anger outbursts, disproportionate verbal and physical aggression… These are all signs that may indicate intermittent explosive disorder (IED). I know what I’m talking about because someone in my family has it. For a long time, I struggled to understand their explosive anger reactions. I think they themselves didn’t know why they reacted that way… until they were diagnosed. Let me explain.

How to Dare to Approach Others? 7 Tips to Follow

The big introvert that I am has long struggled to approach others. It’s true that taking a step toward someone isn’t easy, especially when you’re dealing with additional challenges: introversion, lack of self-confidence, social anxiety… Having experienced all of this myself, but having made progress over the past few years, I have a few tips to share with you so that you too can come out of your shell. Let’s get started!

The Psychological Impact of a Burglary: How to Overcome It?

If I’ve never experienced a burglary as an adult, I did go through it during my childhood. I remember the uneasy feeling of knowing that strangers had entered our home. I kept wondering if they would come back… The psychological impact of a burglary should not be underestimated. What does it trigger? How can one overcome the feelings of fear and insecurity? Let me share my thoughts with you.

Is Working With Your Partner A Good Or Bad Idea?

Sharing everything with your partner is a sign of a healthy relationship for some people, even when it comes to working. However, that being said, for others, working with their partner just seems like a bad idea and the perfect recipe for tension. Do we need to separate our personal and professional lives, or is it okay to blur the lines and mix everything? After all, what could do wrong? Find out how to cope when your significant other is also your coworker!

My Sister Is Jealous Of Me

“In any case, you’re the favorite.” I’ve heard this phrase coming from my sister’s mouth over and over again. For a long time, her jealousy spoiled our lives, but I only wanted one thing: for us to be close and united. She poured her resentment in my face for many years until it got out of control. I couldn’t stand feeling so much anger and guilt at the same time. Soothing 30 years of jealousy hasn’t been easy, but there are ways to avoid getting to that point. I didn’t want jealousy to cut me off from my sister!

How Do Narcissistic People Treat Their Children?

Growing up with narcissistic parents is certainly no easy feat, because, let's face it, people with this disorder are unsympathetic, selfish, manipulative, egotistical, and dishonest, yes, that's right, these traits aren't exactly those showcased by the parents of the year. Realistically, these folks simply don't have the basic qualities required to become good parents, which is why, when they choose to have a family, things often spin out of control, and the narcissistic abuse undoubtedly crushes children's mental health.

Why Do I Want To Seduce Everyone? Compulsive Seduction Explained

Is the gaze and approval of others essential for you? Are you incapable of saying no? Do you do everything you can to get yourself noticed? This excessive need to please may well be indicative of a profound uneasiness. Why do you need to feel validated by other people so much? And how can you free yourself from this oppressing tendency? We reveal everything you need to know for a more straightforward lifestyle.



Wengood's favorite tunes 🎵

Wengood's playlist

wengood

  1. Only LoveBen Howard
    4:08
  2. Invalid date
  3. Fix YouColdplay
    4:55
  4. Beautiful DayU2
    4:08
  5. Thinking out LoudEd Sheeran
    4:41
  6. White FlagDido
    4:00
  7. Lay Me DownSam Smith
    4:13
  8. Nine Million BicyclesKatie Melua
    3:17
  9. Put Your Records OnCorinne Bailey Rae
    3:35
  10. Summertime SadnessLana Del Rey
    4:24
  11. Imagine - Remastered 2010John Lennon
    3:07
  12. Shake It OutFlorence + The Machine
    4:37
  13. Space Oddity - Love You Til Tuesday versionDavid Bowie
    3:46
  14. What A Wonderful WorldLouis Armstrong
    2:17
  15. With Or Without YouU2
    4:56
  16. HelloAdele
    4:55
  17. Don't Stop Me NowQueen
    3:29
  18. Skinny LoveBirdy
    3:21
  19. WingsBirdy
    4:12
  20. Californian SoilLondon Grammar
    3:41

How to detect a narcissist

How to detect a narcissist

How to soothe an anxiety attack

How to soothe an anxiety attack