The Ultimate Survival Guide To Dealing With A Break-Up

Last updated by Katie M.

Getting over an ex isn’t always an easy process because we all mend, move on and heal differently. Whilst for some of us, a quick hookup and a few weeks of reflection is enough, others take much longer to move forward and on to new things. Whatever method you choose when it comes to forgetting about your past love experiences, know that it takes a lot of strength of character. The post breakup period can make us feel lonely and lost, but believe us when we say there is light at the end of the tunnel. Discover the motions people go through, and the steps involved to being able to recover for heartbreak.

The Ultimate Survival Guide To Dealing With A Break-Up
Contents:

Why do breakups hurt so much?

Whenever a relationship comes to an end and heartbreak kicks in, the reality of what awaits us often comes to light. Going your own separate ways can be daunting and intimidating, but it’s an important part of the healing process. When going through this, you’ll no doubt have to face some strong emotions during this period, but rest assured, because that it’s all part of the rebuilding process. 

Sadness

Everyone goes through heartbreak differently, yet some will be confronted with particularly strong feelings of anger, depression and even denial.

What differentiates dealing with a separation to the idea of grieving the death of a loved one; is the idea that life goes on. Although the two scenarios seem vastly different, they both implicate pain, sadness, hurt and discomfort. That being said, separations can lead us to losing confidence in ourselves and wondering for example what you could have done differently or why you weren’t good enough.

Following a romantic split, we normally go through a stage of blaming ourselves. We often even wonder if we’ll ever meet anyone again in the future. No matter what has gone on or how hard you tried, know that you cannot prevent the inevitable. If you weren't meant to be, nothing could have changed the outcome. Love is not something we can rationally understand, which is why it can be so tough for us to let go and move on.

>>> Identify if you're in a toxic relationship here and find out if crying is a bad thing.

What is it that hurts us the most?

In every sincere relationship, we instantly feel comfortable and safe with our partner, yet this is why we sometimes lose our way when things come to an end. Facing the end of a love story can even make you feel as if you’ve lost part of yourself. A rupture will submerge you in memories of your past relationships, and you may even feel like you can’t get through certain moments. 

Rebuilding yourself and your confidence will be a trying journey, but will help you find who you are really.

How can we heal after a breakup?

By getting back to the basics and spending time doing what you love, you’ll definitely find yourself on the right track. Life is full of changes, and we all have what it takes to face and overcome them. When we decide to take control and pick ourselves up, we become stronger and learn our true value.

The challenge involves accepting what you have lost and realizing that life goes on. Taking the positive points from your love story; including what you have learned, will also help you take a step in the right direction. Although you’ll go through hard times, tell yourself that tomorrow is a new day and that positive things are coming your way.

>>> We think you might also like; How to rediscover your libido.

Can we truly ever get over and move on from someone we loved?

If we take a closer look at the definition of forgetting, it involves leaving something somewhere or forgiving. The truth is, we never forget about our past partner. In fact, to fully move forward from them, we need to intensely work on ourselves and accept the reality of the situation. 

Happy

Splitting up is at times for the best, which is something you’ll eventually learn. Read about what you shouldn't do after a breakup.

Why can’t I get over my ex? - 4 Reasons why

According to a study conducted by Binghamton University, women are more affected by a breakup than men. Yet, after some time and further questioning, they are the first to move on. Men usually just move on, without really thinking about the situation or understanding.

I can't get over my ex, why? 

  • You have difficulty filling the void
  • You are still emotionally dependent
  • You hate your ex and you feel frustrated
  • You feel too much guilt about your relationship

1) You feel a huge void

During your relationship, you establish habits, routines, and full daily life together. And today, you find yourself alone. In this case, you usually miss his presence more than the person himself. Your Wednesday night movie routine may seem sad without your ex. But it's more a matter of getting used to her presence and having your daily routine turned upside down. However, you must accept the fact that from now on, you will have to carry out these habits alone. It's not easy, but as you go along, you have to get used to being alone and establishing new routines without her.

2) Emotional dependence is still too present

You've tried to rebuild your life by moving on, but unfortunately, nothing works. When you say to yourself I can't get over my ex, it means that you haven't finished your personal reconstruction. There is really no fixed time frame for the process of getting over your ex. It depends on your relationship, the reasons for the breakup, and your sensitivity.

3) You hate your ex

You hate your ex, he hates you, and it's an extremely conflicted relationship you've forged. If he left you or your relationship ended in a hurtful situation, you may be filled with frustration. Your main feelings are anger and a desire for revenge.

4) You feel guilty about your breakup

After a breakup, emotions can take over and force us to act out of proportion. This creates a deep sense of guiltYou made mistakes and acted in the wrong way, and now you regret it. Even if you caused the separation, or it was your fault, you can't get over your ex because he haunts you.

5) Regrets hold us back

Sometimes we can't get over an ex because we have regrets. Indeed, it is possible that, during the relationship or the breakup, you made mistakes or that you have things to say to your ex today. It is therefore quite logical that the memory of your ex has become anchored in your head. You still have some unfinished business with them, and your subconscious is not shy about reminding you of this.

Editor's opinion: Everyone is different

We all experience emotions and tough situations differently, which is why it's important for us to be supported whenever we are feeling down. The key to healing and making ourselves feel better isn't ice cream, it's time! Time helps us put things into perspective and is crucial in urging us to look forward to the future. Don't beat yourself up if you don't feel totally okay after a recent split because you've been through a tough ordeal. You need to be kind to yourself and realize that you are strong enough to get through this challenging period.

🤗 Understand yourself, accept yourself, be happy... Let’s do it here and now!

#BornToBeMe

More great content for you to read:

Article presented by Katie M.

🌻 Discover the world through my eyes.

Ya its tru

Esimaje bola 4 years ago

Read our latest articles here:

The Toast Theory Or How To Look On The Bright Side

Imagine you’re having breakfast, you’re heating up your tea or coffee, and you get the urge to toast some bread. Everything’s going well, you sit down at the table and butter your toast. Then all of a sudden, clumsily, the toast falls to the floor. Obviously, it falls on the wrong side, the butter side, and picks up all the dust and hairs lying around on the tiles. YUM! But it seems that it’s not all bad that the sandwich falls on this side... Let’s explain!

Am I In An Emotionally Abusive Relationship?

Love is such an unpredictable journey that it gives the perfect cover for emotionally abusive partners to hide behind masks of perfect Mr. Darcy-like characters. Now, let's face it, no devious manipulator enters a relationship by showing their true colors. In the beginning, they make for caring and supportive partners, that is, until they've got you completely hooked. Once they believe you are sufficiently spellbound by them, they'll put their despicable plan of emotional abuse into play, and their victims won't suspect a thing before it's too late. Signs of emotional mistreatment aren't always easy to pick up on, however, these types of partners do have a common modus operandi.

6 Examples Of Moving Farewell Letters, It’s Time To Open Your Heart

"Love stories usually end badly." As you know as well as Les Rita Mitsoukos, love isn’t a direct path to eternity. Sometimes it disappears from our hearts, leaving a great emptiness, if not fierce hatred. That’s when it’s time to say goodbye, and a letter can sometimes be the most effective way of saying exactly how you feel and explaining why you’re leaving. Here are 6 examples of farewell letters, to say goodbye, ciao, or bye-bye to a loved one, but also to a friend or, more sadly, to a loved one who has died.

So What If I Hate Working?

I always thought that I was surrounded by people who loved their jobs, that is until I started openly talking about how much I hate working. Let’s get one thing straight, I’ve never liked my job, but have only recently built up the courage to talk about it. That's right, I used to hide my despair under a huge smile in an effort to convince myself I was overreacting, plus I was also afraid of other people judging me. In fact, daring to share my thoughts got me asking if I was the problem; was I the black sheep? Or, were my reasons for this bold statement justified? It's time to see if are all secretly on the same wavelength.

Am I Too Demanding Of My Partner And Too Tough On Him?

Excessive expectations, intense routines and warped images of relationships often make our love stories difficult to manage and maintain. A relationship is one of life’s greatest balancing acts and requires compromises to be made regularly. In short, one cannot be too demanding or severe with their partner if they want a smooth sailing union. Being so tough is a way of testing our partner's feelings for us, yet this can lead to extremely toxic behavior. Although, thanks to our tips, you'll know how to turn things around.

Ergophobia: When The Fear Of Work Eats Away At You…

I know the real fear of work. I suffered from it for a long time, but I’m happy to say that today I’m cured. It’s an illness that can make others smile, as you can easily be seen as lazy. However, it’s not the case for people suffering from ergophobia, the fear of work. Where does this fear come from? How can it be treated? All will be explained.

Do Narcissists Know They Are Narcissists? Are They Aware?

When it comes to people with narcissistic personality disorder, it is often difficult to distinguish the truth from the common misconceptions. In this precise case, I thought it was about time we took a closer look at their psyche and inner workings of their consciousness, by addressing whether they are privy to their condition. After all, people with such an intense sense of entitlement and serious lack of empathy must realize that they are narcissistic; right? Well, in fact, the answer to that is not exactly black and white, so let’s take a look at why.

What Phrases Do Narcissists Say? - 20 Crushing Statements

Narcissists are known for having a certain way with words, these folks certainly use this talent to their advantage, that's to say, to sink their teeth into their victims. Now, these calculating crooks don't use their gift of the gab to build people up, no, of course, they don't! Instead, the opposite is true, they use their smoothness to tear down their victims, destroy their confidence, and isolate them from their loved ones, all whilst brainwashing them and pretending to be the real victim. Wow, I don't know about you, but to me, that seems like a lot of work! Now, as skillful narcissists are, they can't completely dissimulate their true intentions and at points, their tongue betrays them, as you'll soon see in the following quotes. Here's what they typically say to bring people down...

Are Narcissists Born Or Made? - Let's Settle The Debate

There you have it, the nature vs nurture debate is back, only this time I want to focus it on those deviously manipulative personalities we refer to as narcissists. Now, evidently these folks get bad press and rightly so because they are often at the root of plenty of harm, but is it really their fault? Can they really be blamed for their terrifying and perhaps inherent traits, or are they simply just products and in this case victims of their environments? Let’s settle this debate once and for all and figure out how and when this disorder becomes apparent. So, are you born a narcissist or is it developed?

Do Narcissists Regret Hurting People?

From their lack of empathy to their scarily manipulative and controlling streak, narcissists arguably display despicable behavior that simply can’t be condoned. Once these people get their claws into a victim, they become ruthless and have absolutely no regard for the effects their behavior may have on their mental health. Now, as with many syndromes, nothing is black and white with these types of personality disorders. In fact, there are certainly many inaccurate theories regarding their relationship with remorse regarding their actions, and that’s why I’m here to set the record straight.



Wengood's favorite tunes 🎵

Wengood's playlist

wengood

  1. Only LoveBen Howard
    4:08
  2. Invalid date
  3. Fix YouColdplay
    4:55
  4. Beautiful DayU2
    4:08
  5. Thinking out LoudEd Sheeran
    4:41
  6. White FlagDido
    4:00
  7. Lay Me DownSam Smith
    4:13
  8. Nine Million BicyclesKatie Melua
    3:17
  9. Put Your Records OnCorinne Bailey Rae
    3:35
  10. Summertime SadnessLana Del Rey
    4:24
  11. Imagine - Remastered 2010John Lennon
    3:07
  12. Shake It OutFlorence + The Machine
    4:37
  13. Space Oddity - Love You Til Tuesday versionDavid Bowie
    3:46
  14. What A Wonderful WorldLouis Armstrong
    2:17
  15. With Or Without YouU2
    4:56
  16. HelloAdele
    4:55
  17. Don't Stop Me NowQueen
    3:29
  18. Skinny LoveBirdy
    3:21
  19. WingsBirdy
    4:12
  20. Californian SoilLondon Grammar
    3:41

How to detect a narcissist

How to detect a narcissist

How to soothe an anxiety attack

How to soothe an anxiety attack